Using my grief to help others: Michele's volunteer experience at a Grief Kind Space
After her husband was cared for by the expert team at Sue Ryder Leckhampton Court Hospice, Michele King, 66, started volunteering to give something back to the charity. This year she took on a new volunteer role at the Sue Ryder Grief Kind Space in Cheltenham, using her own experiences to help others navigate their grief. Here she explains how the Grief Kind Space works, and why it’s such an important form of support for its members.
Michele's story
The first time I came across Sue Ryder was when my second husband died of cancer. They looked after him at home for his last few days, and I always said that I would give something back. When I retired last year, I decided it was time to start volunteering.
First, I volunteered as a gardener. And then in the winter, it was really hard work, and I did a little bit of office work instead. Then the Sue Ryder Grief Kind Space was created in March, and I've been volunteering here ever since. I have experienced my fair share of grief with my husband’s loss to cancer, and also my mum and my best friend. But I survived it all and learned valuable life lessons along the way. So, I thought I could contribute and help others with their grief too.
I have experienced my fair share of grief... But I survived it all and learned valuable life lessons along the way.
What is a Grief Kind Space?
The Grief Kind Space does exactly what the name suggests. It's a safe space to come and cry, swear, or blame everything under the sun. You can talk with a group of people who have experienced the same thing and know what you’re feeling. It helps you understand where you're at, and know that other people are grieving and hurting too.
Usually when someone new arrive, the tears come out. We let them talk about what they are experiencing, and about any specific issues. Sometimes people have a family who have left them behind, or friends who suddenly disappear. That's quite common. You tend to lose friends, not because people are nasty, but because people don't know how to talk to somebody who's been bereaved and they're afraid of saying the wrong thing.
It's a safe space to come and cry, swear, or blame everything under the sun.
Becoming a volunteer
To become a volunteer at the Grief Kind Space I had a full day of group training. It was really important to highlight what to say and what not to say and discuss the kind of problems that we might encounter. I felt prepared when I came here. if you have experienced grief in your own life it's really important to understand it's not about your grief, but other people's. But being a volunteer continues to help my personal healing. It gives me a sense of satisfaction that I can help somebody, especially people who have no other support.
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